I have a really hard time forgiving people. And when I mean forgiving people, I mean actually forgiving them. Like forgiving them in my heart. I can say the words to them and I can act like I forgive them, but at the end of the day, I’m still hurt. And I’ve been trying to work on that.
If you know me at all, you know that I always wear my heart on my sleeve. And let me tell you, when you wear your heart on your sleeve, it gets damaged really easily. And when it’s damaged really easily, it’s hard to forgive who hurt you.
When really thinking about it, Jesus doesn’t want us to continue to have hate and hurt in our hearts. John 13:34-35 says “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” Sometimes I’m not being a good disciple because I don’t love the people who hurt me in my heart. But that’s the reason why Jesus called us to be disciples, to love others and show others His love. Which means forgiving people who might have hurt you.
I’m still learning and still trying to be a good disciple of Christ, but a lot of the time I fall short. The thing that keeps me going is John 13:34-35. I try to replace the words “one another” with the person’s name that hurt me. I may have to repeat it over and over, but eventually (and it takes me a LONG time to get here) I get to a better place with them.
Forgiveness is hard, but having Jesus in our hearts and trying to show His love makes it a little bit easier.