Discipline: It Does A Girl Good
Mixed emotions are what I have when I think of discipline. I’m the product of a lot of discipline both good and bad. One parent used shame with discipline; the other used logic. Both had purpose and goals for their approach to correction. Looking back at how I was raised, I benefitted from both styles. I am who I am today as a result of the guidance I received. No pain, no gain as they say!
- Healthy fear
- Respect for others
- How to sit at the dinner table and have a conversation
- To wait my turn
- And, I wasn’t the most important person in the world
This list is short, but it makes my point.
[pullquote width=”300″ float=”right”]God’s correction and guidance brings greater trust, deeper devotion, and renewed hope for what’s coming next…[/pullquote]My mom told me recently, “My job was to raise four kids who would become decent, kind, caring, productive adults.” I’ve forgiven her for making us go to bed in the summer when it was still light out. Trust me, the woman had her reasons. She told me we’d kept her on her toes all day and she needed a little alone time J. My mother was wise beyond her years in the 60s. Young families today could learn a lot from her.
The discipline of my childhood wasn’t bad; it was good and it makes me think of Hebrews 12:11.
Who can argue against this truth?
No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
The Bible speaks to us about discipline, self-control, and correction. What for? It’s for our good; it trains us to be godly children of a great Father.
On and off over the past 30 years I’ve complained to my husband about my dad’s method for correcting something about me he thought needed change. What he did didn’t have the impact he hoped for; it didn’t “fix” me. Instead, I carry the pain of that ongoing discipline with me to this day. Something my guy said helped me move on and have a better understanding of the motive behind my dad’s discipline. He said, “Your dad did what he did for your benefit, his method may have been off, but he wanted the best for you.” This made my attitude about discipline take a turn.
It was for my own good. It was to keep me from harm. It was meant to bring out the best in me.
I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t say I’ve needed my share of correction as a member and leader of a local body of believers, and as a woman who’s a wife, mother, and friend. God’s correction and guidance brings greater trust, deeper devotion, and renewed hope for what’s coming next in my relationship with him and others. The best thing that comes is change and a bit more maturity.
When I say things that are harsh and unkind, Ephesians 4:29 says:
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
When I lose my temper, James 1:19-20 says:
Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
When the green-eyed monster rears its ugly head, Proverbs 14:30 says:
A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.
Now that I’m an a grown woman being guided by the perfect Father, I’ve learned to be the wise builder Jesus talks about in Luke 6…
As for everyone who comes to me and hears my words and puts them into practice, I will show you what they are like. They are like a man building a house, who dug down deep and laid the foundation on rock.
Hear and put into practice are powerful words that give us guidance!
Our discipline is hearing God’s words, doing what they say, and allowing them to change us. When we do these we demonstrate our belief in his promise to keep us from harm and to watch over our life.
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“Hear and put into practice are powerful words…” Putting it into practice is the great payoff to the pain! And the bigger perspective you talked of, helps a bunch too! Thx for sharing, Terri.
Amen, sister! Put into practice; it’s an every single day thing.
It’s hard to view misguided discipline as acts of love, isn’t it? But that perspective is like balm to a bruised heart.
Oh my gosh, yes. Misguided discipline ruled me for way too long. Love your words “balm to a bruised heart.” I may borrow those someday 🙂
Felt similar to Amber after reading your post. I remember a little plaque that said something like, “Do the best you can with what you have, and when you know better, do better.” I like to view the discipline I received through that lens and your post definitely speaks well to that.
When you know better, do better – I love that. Thanks, always, for your feedback.
The perspective of knowing in our heart that God loves us, knows what we need and delivers the message to us via His Word allows for the acceptance of that discipline. Not always easy, but always worthwhile. Thanks for the reminder that it is all there in the Book. Now to put it into practice….
You’re right, Marilyn, it’s all there in the Book. I love the what we’ve been given. Thanks!
I whine and I rationalize and I pout and I put off… all the while knowing how much better I would be if I would just listen and obey.
Obedience is so, so, so hard in every aspect of life; however, there’s a reason, right? Grateful for a patient and gracious God.
“Our discipline is hearing God’s words, doing what they say, and allowing them to change us. When we do these we demonstrate our belief in his promise to keep us from harm and to watch over our life.”
Sometimes I don’t like to hear what God has to say, so I go about my business doing things my own way.
He probably gives a good belly laugh and thinks to himself “go ahead Tara, give it a whirl.” Thanks for the reminder to be obedient to our Father’s direction, even when we don’t like it.