Well, Should I Change?

Date night with my man, a.k.a my favorite night of the week! I’m in gym shorts and sneakers because we like to hike. Yes, also because they are super comfortable.

But tonight, we decide to go grab some grub for dinner. Remember, I am still rocking gym shorts. I think to myself, “I have to change right? Don’t I need to dress up for my husband? Won’t that make him proud of me? Maybe even ensure that he continues to like me?”

So I timidly ask, “Well, should I change?”

I’m pretty sure I know what his answer is going to be. It will most likely be the same answer he gave me the last 20 times I asked him. I just want to hear it again.

He looks me in the eyes and says in a confident, without a doubt tone of voice, “Don’t change.”

As the world screams, “Change. Put on the skirt. Grab the higher heels. Be better. Don’t forget the lip gloss.” My husband quickly states, “Don’t change.”

His words offer an ounce of healing for my heart lacking the full weight of truth. A heart that has been wounded by the temptation to use my image as a token for love, acceptance, compliment, a glance, whatever I can get.

I hope I can be a woman who chooses to change in the areas that matter most. I want to be a woman who thinks more about changing her heart than changing her hairstyle, house décor or outfit.

I want to change where it matters most.


Grace & Such strives to advance Christian growth among women. While we believe the Bible is the inspired Word of God, we also recognize human interpretations are imperfect. Grace & Such encourages our readers to open their Bibles, pray for wisdom and study for themselves what the Word says. For more about who we are, please visit the About Us page.
April Jean
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  1. Gretchen on October 14, 2015 at 3:12 PM

    It’s funny…I’ve actually been trying a little harder to change and get my pretty on for my husband, not because I don’t trust that he loves me, but because I don’t want him to think I’ve taken him for granted–by the way, my husband would always tell me not to change, too. 🙂 His acceptance and love and TRUTH is so freeing. I very much appreciate the reminder that it’s not all about the outfit and makeup, though. It’s the heart which matters. And I think, whether we change or not, God is growing us to be aware of where our hearts are, and where He would like them to be.

  2. April on October 17, 2015 at 7:44 PM

    Thank you, thank you, very true! I appreciate you sharing a bit of where you are on the journey too. 🙂

  3. Jen on October 19, 2015 at 9:53 AM

    You are so cute on the outside and so beautiful on the inside and you have a God who sees your true worth, just as your husband does.

    • April on October 20, 2015 at 6:51 PM

      Thank you Jen, you’re sweet! 🙂

  4. Denise on October 22, 2015 at 11:45 AM

    Being the single gal on the block, I struggle w/whether or not I should venture in the grocery store at 6:15 am in my pjs (Josh has morning football practices) or whether I should throw on a cute VS sweatsuit and take my hair bonnet off just in case my Mr. Right is in there that morning…lol. I opt to keep the pjs and hairbonnet on. I figure, if a guy is remotely interested, he can appreciate the courage it takes for a woman to venture out into the world in her pjs and is more concerned about whatever she needs to pick up vs her appearance (especially that early in the morning). I do, however, make sure my pjs are of the cute, warm and fuzzy variety…lol). Thank you April for reminding us that what’s on the inside matters more than the outside :).

    • April on October 27, 2015 at 7:28 AM

      Denise, I love your example.. and love that you rock your PJ’s to the grocery store, you go girl! ps. Sending you a big hug Denise!! <3

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